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She calls me Wife …

In domestication, Uncategorized, women on January 19, 2011 at 5:11 am

For the last year and some change I have been more or less living with a bunch of guys. Now these guys are nor ordinary guys, they are like my brothers. They have in fact redefined what it means to be a man to me. They are known to me, and a couple of others, as the men of 5519. In any case, while they were unknowingly reshaping my imagine of a man, I was unknowingly becoming domesticated by them.

My first long stay with the men of 5519 was right after I graduated from college, that visit lasted approximately 3 weeks. I graduated with a high gpa, a whole lot of friends, and with about 17 more pounds than I came into college with. By my standards I still looked fine but, while living with them, what I thought of as fine now seemed like it needed some fine-tuning.

Hearing the men that I admired speak about the qualities and traits that they admire in a women eventually lead me to the mirror for a hard look. They spoke of a woman who takes care of her self, as in exercising, a woman who has interest and talents that define her, a woman who has a sense of who she is but can acknowledge that there is still growing to do, a woman who can know how to step out of her emotions and evaluate things rationally (or at least admit that she is caught in her feelings) and of course that wife quality “being domesticated”.

Let me expand on that … No! they are not talking about being barefoot in the house, only cooking and cleaning waiting on them hand and foot. Rather, it’s about being their partner in crime but at the core of it all just being their partner. Being able to provide a womanly comfort that only we, woman, know how to do. Being able to cook him food to start his day on a good note or end it on a better one, naturally being tidy and giving a constant sense of calm in the home etc. These little things that just make a person feel a bit more cared for and at ease.

At first I was very “high and mighty” to say the least, refusing the thought of cooking or cleaning for someone. I was so stuck on the concept that in order to be a “Strong Women” I had to lose my “sex” and just be strong never thinking that I could blend these realms and be something so much more. My men of 5519 made me want to care for them though, and in doing that I realized that I like the feeling of providing in the small ways, I like cooking breakfast, I like making dinner, I enjoy being able to share a clean space and put a womans touch on things.

So now, I sit on my best-friend of 12 years, couch I lean over and ask her “Would you like me to cook something?” and her response is “Sure wife” I guess after 23 years I am finally starting to posses those “Wife like” qualities ….

At the end of the day, I say, at least learn how to cook, clean, wash etc if for no one else than do it for yourself.

A year and a half later ….. DRUM ROLL PLEASE……. I am 17 pounds lighter, an artist by my own right, and happily domesticated ;-).

What do you think about “domestication”? Is it still a 1950’s trend or something that needs to be brought back to life during the independent women era?

Life with a Donk

In Uncategorized on January 17, 2011 at 11:23 pm

Life with a DONK”
Okay, So I said that I would now start writing about any topics that my friends, followers, and supporters suggested. That being said ….. Lets Begin:

Topic 1 – LIFE WITH A DONK

“I dont think you ready, for this jelly. Cause my body’s too Bootylicious”

It has been deemed, by many, that your blessing is most often your curse. That philosophy is no different when it comes to the physical nature of your body. Anyone who knows me, knows that …. Well…… I have a *donk also known as *a big butt. (Now it is not the biggest, I know, but I have never heard anyone call it small) lol

Now honestly, I can say that I LOVE my rear end BUT can I say that it isn’t annoying sometimes? NO

Having a DONK is great! Especially in a day in age were like in Roman times the curvier and more voluptuous women are regarded as having the ideal body types. When I put on a dress to go out, lord the DONK makes a world of a difference. A plain fitted tee and fitted jeans can look like an amazing outfit, JUST because of the way your DONK lines those jeans.

Additionally if you are lucky … you have these things called HIPS! They serve as a perfect combo to a Donk ……. BUT like I said every gift can be a curse.

CLOTHES – I can be such a horrible task trying to find jeans that fit you the right way! Now, I suppose any girl could say this BUT let’s be real: When your hips/ass measurement is a 40 and your waist is a 28, It is quite difficult to find something in just any store.

TYPES OF CLOTHES – When you have a DONK you can not or better yet SHOULD not wear everything that the “skinny girls” wear. In other words, those overly baggy, poof out skirts, leggings, oversized shorts, over sized shirts etc. You can wear these things, but all run the risk of making you look much bigger than you are …. So be careful!

WEIGHT – While having a DONK is great … It can also make you seem much bigger than you are and in due time that donk can become less attractive. Donk’s usually come with thighs which means you need to run, squat, lunge, and do leg lifts to unsure that as time moves on your ASS wont move in every direction with it! I find that Cardio is the best way to shape yourself up as a *thick chick. So Ladies get to running.

(And wear a big shirt when you do! Guys tend to stare too much if you don’t)

PHOTOS – You will be amazed but the way you stand or place your hands in a photo can also drastically add on the pounds. This is usually due to having large hips but if you are not with the “hippy” crowd then No Worries 🙂

Regardless of these things I can say I would not want my body any other way. I LOVE MY DONK …. It does NOT define me but it sure is a nice accent 😉

No More Pressure: Make it Simple Stupid

In Uncategorized on January 14, 2011 at 2:04 am

Ever feel like life is sending you a thousand signs? Lately that is all that I have been feeling. It started somewhere around the time when I was reading the Alchemist in which the theory of beginners luck sort of served to be a prelude of the great things to come in that field. Next was Rich Dad, Poor Dad, in that book the author said “Often, in life its not the smart that get ahead but the bold.” Now maybe I am just adding value to these “signs” or making them just that “a sign” but isn’t that what life is all about? Perceptions.

My perception is usually just that I need to live up to some unmeasuremable standard, in anything that I do. I am seemingly what I like to call a jumper. While, I consider myself to be talented in several feilds I jump ship before a failure can make its presence known, then days, weeks or months later swim back only to make a guest apperance. Why is that? Well its because I am not making it simple stupid.

A good friend of mine asked me why I do not write on my blog often? My immediate response was crowded with a bunch of excuses. Particularliy circling around some idea that people expected to hear something more than I could perhaps give them.   He responded that “its damn near insane that you put so much value in your work but then worry about what value others would put in it” … I digress … All of that to say I have realized that it is not about sentence structure or trying to sound sophiticated, poetic, deep, witty etc. Its about me doing what I want … That thing I will do when I’m 70 years old with nothing else to do: Write.

So now while I go out and try and stick to that element that has probably always defined me I implore you to do the same! I can pay someone for sentence structure I can’t pay them for my thoughts 😉

– Special thanks to Small-Warner for the “brotherly conversation”